Don't Step On The Flowers

( Wastelands. Wastelands as far... (SPOILERS for FFVII: Crisis Core within!) )

[And done! Thanks to glacial_witch and findingelena for their participation! This follows this post and is the last one we're going to tack up, honest. NFI, NFB, OOC = Love.]

Admittedly, a Wednesday night was a pretty shitty night to go to any bar that didn't actually have something going on. And, in a place like Edge, it wasn't just Wednesday nights that were like that, even at the most popular stop for alcoholic swill in town. It wasn't as though people were going to get together and sing karaoke. Name that tune was pretty much a thing of the past, too. Trivia night? Not so much. But if you got Cid Highwind drunk enough, he'd tell you all about that time he spent about five minutes stuck outside of Gaia's atmosphere.

Word to the wise: Don't get Cid Highwind drunk enough to tell you all about that time he spent about five minutes stuck outside of Gaia's atmosphere.

Fortunately, Reno didn't come to the bar unprepared. He was a Turk. He came prepared for anything, thank you very much. There was a stun baton hidden up his sleeve, extra money for booze tucked away in one pocket, and a deck of cards in one hand. Tifa even tolerated his presence here because he was more or less good business, and he tended to handle her cutting him off when she'd decided that he'd had enough with... minimal leering. Which made him significantly less obnoxious than some of the folks that stopped in for drinks.

And anyhow, kicking the asses of the bar's other regulars at poker? Totally made hitting this place up on his evening off worth any unpleasant aftertaste that his allotted few servings of Corel Ale left behind.

Hey, it wasn't Reno's fault that Barrett was shit at calling bluffs.

[Open for anyone who might want to give Reno a phone call, or what-have-you. He'll probably gloat at you relentlessly, just to rile up the big guy some more.]

It was one of those rare nights that Reno had managed to score all to himself, off-duty, with not a single reason to worry about Tseng calling him in out of the blue to do some urgent mission or another. Why? Because Rude had the night off, too, and Tseng knew better than to try to call Reno in when Rude would do the job just as well, and without whining about it.

And so, there he was, sprawled backwards on the couch (and doing an admirable job of ignoring the busted springs in his back) and staring up at the ceiling, contemplating where in the world he was supposed to go from here and the obstacles on his way to wherever that turned out to be.

"Winter's coming, yo." He paused, and then, with a faint smirk on his lips, he added, "Fehdan'c lusehk."

At the very least, it wasn't as though he'd be making the trip alone.

[For that girl who speaks the funny language. And sure, open for phone calls or whatever, if you'd like.]

"I'm friggin' bored," Reno announced, possibly to nobody in particular, possibly to the bowl of beans that he'd picked. "Bored bored bored."

The beans said nothing.

"You know how bored I am?"

The beans waited patiently for a reply.

"I'm so friggin' bored, I'm talkin' to string beans."

This was what happened when Reno got himself suspended from duty for two weeks.

Fear.

[NFB for distance, as usual, but totally open for phone calls!]

Distress calls from Rookies, left, right, and center. That was what Reno came home to, after over a week without phone reception out in the wastes. And now it was the countdown, before one Rookie would get here, with Ifrit only knew what kind of trauma fresh in her head.

Pick up the phone. Dial numbers. He had well over an hour, between the time Ino's portal would arrive to pick her up, and the time it would actually make it into Edge, after all.

"The boss sends me on one mission in the middle of nowhere, Mako, an' the whole universe goes to Hell without me, zoto."

[NFB for distance, as usual. Open for anyone who needs a Reno call or who wants to give one, all calls will sit chronologically before a certain Ninja visitor, yo.]

It had been another long, hard night. Tseng seemed to be doing everything in his power to drive Reno to the point of cracking since Elena had taken off for Fandom, and Reno couldn't exactly blame him. This time, it had been a run to the outskirts of the makeshift city, under heavy gunfire, to neutralize a group of citizens who had gotten fed up with the poverty. They'd gone out, found themselves some weapons inside the wreckage of the old ShinRa building, and had taken to going door-to-door, shaking people down and waving said guns in their faces until they handed over all of their food.

Not cool.

( In Which Stuff Happens, And Reno Has A Chewy Ear. )

[Open for phone calls or what-have-you.]

There were some things that were totally worth getting in trouble with the boss for, Reno decided. Being a grumpy son of a bitch was good for things like getting on Tseng's nerves, teaching the rookie how to run for cover, and also for getting sent on impromptu vacations to other worlds in order to visit the girlfriend.

It had totally been worth it. But, as such things tend to go, this vacation didn't last forever, and soon Reno was hopping another portal back to Edge.

The first thing he did upon getting home was reach for the Everclear that Romeo had sent him. Romeo was still the best buddy ever, and Reno was going to have to find some way to make it up to him. Maybe he'd ship him some porn or something. That was always excellent payback, right?

And then he checked the texts and voicemails that he'd missed lately. Which led to a lot of alternating between laughing and frowning. Killing beans and killing babies were two very different things indeed. But hey, verbal Twitters were amusing, at least.

It wasn't until he went to check on the beans to be certain that they were still alive (they were) and the ferret to make sure that he wasn't dead (he wasn't) that a chunk of plaster fell from the ceiling, hitting Reno solidly on the head and reminding him quite firmly that he wasn't in Spira anymore.

Sigh.

"Home sweet shithole."

[NFB for distance and all, but Reno's open for phone calls, text messages, random letters, and all of that good stuff.]

Rude's couch was lumpy and hard to sleep on.

Rude's couch was lumpy and hard to sleep on, Rude's booze was running low, and the lighting in Rude's living room sucked.

All that, and Reno had more reading material than he could have ever hoped for. And a bean sprout in a plastic cup sitting in some wet paper towel. And a pair of cacti that he hadn't managed to kill yet. And an anxious ferret, attempting to help him either with the booze, or with the reading, whichever Mako happened to be able to reach more easily at the time.

As such things went, after a week and a half back in Edge with no outlet to the real world, it was time for Reno to take a break. He'd written a letter earlier in the week in reply to one that he'd gotten last week Thursday, which was all well and good... but dammit, he needed to hear a voice that didn't belong to a Turk, a member of the WRO, or some random person living on the street corners in Edge.

Spare Gil for the homeless, they'd beg, and he'd toss them a few, just because he had a few to spare. But not without a mumble and a frown.

Yeah. You an' everyone else, yo.

He needed to make some freaking phone calls, or he was going to go out of his mind, damn it.

[NFB for distance, open to anyone who thinks that Reno would have a reason to call them! Or, heck, open to anyone. He's bored, he'll probably just hit buttons until he hears familiar voices, at this point.]

Reno was still grumbling as he tried to stare the chopper down. If he looked at it angrily enough, maybe the rotor would break and the gas tank would explode and the blades would all fall off.

( Tell me again why I'm doin' this? )

[[Once again, NFB, NFI, the_merriest is the bestest Rude in the world, establishy, OOC is pretty, BYOB, YMCA, I'm a little teapot, omg newbie day is tomorrow, eeeee.]]