raspberryturk | The Chapel On The Ship, Friday Afternoon

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The Chapel On The Ship, Friday Afternoon

Okay, so there had been a bit of drinking, last night. A little. More than a little. A fair bit. A lot.

Reno and Rikku were totally smashed. Which had led to wacky goings on and terrible fashion choices ~~in a completely handwavey manner~~ involving a horrid Hawaiian shirt, even worse shorts, and one of those hideous fish-ties.

There just so happened to be a chapel on the boat. And, in their particular states of inebriated stupidity and horrible misdress, there had been a revelation...

Weddings totally didn't count if you used fake names, right?

And heck, even if they did, they were drunk enough that it seemed like a very good, very hilarious idea, at the time.

[Open chapel is TOTALLY OPEN. Because... Yes. It must be.]

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Vows and I Dos and all that good stuff!

Grab a pew! Take blackmail photos! Try to talk them out of it!

Try to catch the newlyweds before they run off on their... honeymoon or whatever it is?

Because even drunken crack needs OOC.

Rikku was a little wobbly on her feet. It might have been all the booze. It might have been the lemon yellow go-go boots. They went nicely with her tasteful and elegant gown and the leopard-print pimp hat.

All brides needed leopard-print pimp hats.

"We wan' get married," Rikku announced, tottering on the heels and trying not to slur the words too badly. "We're in looooooooooooooove."

And then: another fit of the giggles.

Reno totally nodded. The steady, emphatic nod of a man who had been drinking entirely too much since at least the night before. The nod of a drunk man who wanted to be particularly convincing.

It was hard to be much of anything, in that shirt.

"I been in love with... Uh..." Naaaames. "Marina Fellina Nadina Scavina Abergoo for, uh. Shit. For forever, yo," he explained, completely seriously. The only thing that really managed to break through his solemn profession of love was the wobbling on his feet and the fact that he was obviously trying very, very hard not to laugh his drunken ass off. "An' we wan' get married."

Jeff wasn't sure how he'd gotten here.

He had a sixth sense for these things, though, so he was definitely there.

Gawking. Attentively.

What? He'd phoned the bride while she was having sex once. That totally counted.

"He pro-- ... he prip-- ... he proo-- ..." Rikku hiccuped, then had to grab his shirt for support. Hiccups were enough to make her teetering worse. Okay! Okay. "He ass'ed me to marr' him."

Wow, her sunburn was starting to ache. And hers wasn't half so bad as his. Desert girl, she'd have a glowy tan in a few days. Reno? Reno looked like a beet. One that was peeling.

"So me an' ..." Right. Names. "Me an' ... Sven ... Higurr ... nurr ... hurr ... nurr ... hurrsssson. He ass'ed an' I said yes. 'Cause. We're in looooooooooooooooove."

She had, in fact, forgotten that she had already shared that vital piece of information with the poor, misbegotten officiants.

Rikku -- Marina -- whatever her fake name was? She saw Jeff and bounced and waved. Yay!

So excitedly that she fell off her damn shoes.

Please hold while the bride discovers whether or not she can stand up again.

"Nyuh-huhhh," Reno agreed, giving another exuberant nod for good measure before fishing his credit card out of his pocket and pointing it at whoever seemed the least horrified at the pair of them. "Marina... Fenadina Abergoo an' Sven Higurrnurr... hurrnergson. Write it down an' marry us, yooooo."

The officiants kind of stared at each other. And then shrugged.

Hey. There was money. And it was... Uh. True love. Or something.

"I know that happens," Jeff told her, leaning over her.

Very, very soberly. "Sorry about that," he added, "You're just very metaphorically naked."

This was so special. An' shit.

Luckily, the on-board wedding chapel specialized in getting couples in, wed, and out again with a minimum of fuss. The biggest hold-up was attempting to spell the names correctly for the paperwork, since Marina Fellina Concertina would probably know how to spell her own name right.

"Then a Y, an' then ..." Rikku leaned over and squinted. "You know what? How 'bout you just spell it how it sounds right to you?" The officiant stared for a few moments, then resumed scribbling. "Yup! That's essactly right. You're a good guesser."

She waved a hand to where Reno was probably buying rings or flowers or some of that ... whatever else they needed. "C'meeeeeere," she leered. "I wanna be your sexy lady. Wife-lady. Mrs. Higurrnurrhurrnurrhurrguson."

"I got clothes on," Rikku announced, struggling to her knees in the most awkward, tacky performance ever accomplished by a blushing bride. (The dress helped.) "Can't get marr'ed without clothes, yanno?"

Reno blinked up, not even bothering to hide the leering he was doing at Rikku's outfit before just randomly pointing at a ring and paying for the whole shebang as quickly as possible.

"An' somethin' else for mine an' stuff," he added.

This was the best junk ever.

Over to the altar he ~~drunkenly stumbled~~ hurried, which earned some more head shaking from the officiants, and there he waited for his beloved. Patiently.

Giggling.

Not only was Hoshi there, but she also brought a recording device. She wasn't about to talk the bride and groom out of doing anything.

Sokka settled into a pew and applauded. Not that anything had happened yet, but he was applauding anyway, dammit.

Then he got up, made sure the people were taping the happy occasion, and paid in advance for a copy.

THEN he sat back down and applauded again.

Well, the officiants had been wanting to get rid of that monstrosity anyway, so. It would do nicely for Mr. Higurrnurr ... hurr ...

Sven. It would do nicely for Sven.

The blushing bride wobbled her way over to the altar, clutched her beloved by his shirt-lapels and laid a thorough tongue-kiss on him. One that the officiants desperately wished they could un-see. Bleach might be required.

"This's so romaaaaaaantick," she sighed happily.

Edited 2009-02-27 22:40 (UTC)

Annja was here because this was the funniest thing she had ever seen. She had a little digital voice recorder, too.

Rikku waved into the camera, bouncing with glee. And trying not to fall off her shoes again.

Heels were a bitch.

I think I love you guys.

"Ponytail!" Rikku slurred happily. "C'mere an' gimme away!"

It didn't matter that they were far past that part of the ceremony. All brides needed a dork in a ponytail to give them away.

Especially ones that had pimp hats.

"S'too bad Tseeeen-... Tzzz. Sssss. Rude wunnit here to see," Reno said, clearly heartbroken. "He'd shit 'mmself, yoooo."

He pointed at the guy with the book an' stuff in front of him.

"Kay. We're all ready an' junk. Marry us, zoooto."

They had no idea what exactly a 'zoto' was supposed to be. But they supposed it would be best to get the ceremony underway before they could be unfortunate enough to find out.

"Careful! It might ruin the honeymoon if you sprain an ankle," said Hoshi, giggling.

Had to happen at least once on this trip. <3

*giggles* Yes, yes it did.

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Page 1 of 5

The Chapel On The Ship, Friday Afternoon

The Ceremony!

The Gawkers!

After the Ceremony!

OOC!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: OOC!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: The Ceremony!

Re: The Gawkers!

Re: OOC!

Re: OOC!