raspberryturk | The Chapel On The Ship, Friday Afternoon

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The Chapel On The Ship, Friday Afternoon

Okay, so there had been a bit of drinking, last night. A little. More than a little. A fair bit. A lot.

Reno and Rikku were totally smashed. Which had led to wacky goings on and terrible fashion choices ~~in a completely handwavey manner~~ involving a horrid Hawaiian shirt, even worse shorts, and one of those hideous fish-ties.

There just so happened to be a chapel on the boat. And, in their particular states of inebriated stupidity and horrible misdress, there had been a revelation...

Weddings totally didn't count if you used fake names, right?

And heck, even if they did, they were drunk enough that it seemed like a very good, very hilarious idea, at the time.

[Open chapel is TOTALLY OPEN. Because... Yes. It must be.]

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"Deadpool!" Rikku bounced excitedly. "You're jus' in time! We bought rings'n ev'rything!"

Apparently, when she was this drunk: yes. Yes, he did.

"I swear to god, if Red over there isn't as drunk or more, I'm skinning him and turning his bright red pelt into a nice jacket, mmkay?"

Reno just so happened to pick just that very moment to blink up from what he was doing, grin the biggest, stupidest grin he could manage, and then wave a very inebriated, chipper hello.

"Yooooooooooooooo!"

Before hiccupping and wobbling and sniffing and returning his attention to whatever was so very fascinating over where the rings were. Riiiiiiings.

They were serious business.

"You! With the fauxullet! Cram it!" Deadpool snapped, glaring at him for a moment before turning his attention back to Rikku. "No getting married."

"It's not real," Rikku said earnestly. "We din't give them our real names. I'm too young to get married. 'Sjust for fun."

Why having a tacky fake-wedding was fun was probably related to all of the liquor. Of which there had been a lot.

"Legality is only one reason not to get married," Deadpool pointed out. "I'mma go gut him now."

Reno had totally picked the ring with the kitty on it. Because it was cute, an' junk, an' Rikku liked cute shit, and it seemed like a great idea at the time.

They were gonna ring through his card or somethin', and he was gonna peeer over at Rikku and Deadpool, 'cause he loved Rikku and Deadpool kinda scared the crap out of him or something, and then he was gonna wave again.

"You gonna give'r away?"

Sway. Wobble. Lean against the nearest officiant so as to avoid falling over.

Everything seemed like a good idea at the time. Like that one time Deadpool decided to try and drink an entire gallon of milk.

It ended badly.

He just rubbed his forehead and wished he's brought his big weapons on this damn cruise. 'You won't need those, Wade,' Nate had said. LIAR.

"I am giving you detention for the rest of the school year and then making you get me coffee. EVERY SINGLE DAY. So sober up quick."

Rikku had carefully wobbled her way over, without falling on her ass. Score!

"Don't 'ppress our love," she insisted. "'Cept it's not our love. I mean. Issa joke. He's Sven Hurrnurrhurrnurrhurrsomethingelseassson. An'." She had to think, for a moment here. Waiting ... waiting ...

"S'not real," she decided. "'Cause I wouldn't dress like a hooker if it was f'r reals."

When Rikku considered an outfit tacky ...

"Hey! Hey. Hey. I would never suppress love," Deadpool informed them. "I will, however be a psychotically over protective adult who has no issues killing him."

Only not. Rikku would be all wibble face at him if he did.

"That's why I love you," Rikku announced, reaching over for a squeezy hug. "'Cause you're all protective-ist and you know I can take care of m'self and you're nifty."

That was as coherent as she was going to manage to put it, while this freaking drunk.

Deadpool just patted her, trying to pull away because... weird. "Go put a shirt on before you hug me again."

"Okay!" she chirped. "I'll go get some clothes. After we do this whole ... thing. Then clothes!"

You know. Fake wedding she was right in the middle of. Then she'd cover up a little.

"If you even think about a honeymoon, I'm killing something."

"No honeymoon," Rikku said solemnly. "We're just gonna go hang out. On the cruise. Doing ... cruise-stuff."

Probably more boozing and sex, but really, she was already on thin ice. This was better left unsaid.

"And I'm still making it my mission to ruin Red's life," Deadpool added.

Okay, so Reno totally couldn't hear them talking from over where he was, poking at the rings, but that wasn't going to stop him from looking up, grinning at them, and flashing them a thumbs-up anyhow. After all, the rings were perfect for... Something!

Of some sort.

Kinda.

It was perfect for this kind of thing, he was sure!

Deadpool just grinned back. "Oh, your ass is mine, fauxullet."

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The Chapel On The Ship, Friday Afternoon

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