Reno of the Turks (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
raspberryturk) wrote2008-05-19 05:45 pm
raspberryturk) wrote2008-05-19 05:45 pm
Lupus A4, Monday Evening
It had been A Day. A week. A whole weekend and Reno, who was still both puny and plastic, was in need of a drink.
He wasn't in a bad enough way that he was going to go to the bar. There were certain things that action figures shouldn't do in public. Sure, he could go to The Perk to give computer lessons and he could scar his friends for life, but the bar? Even if he was hurting for a drink and a smoke and a hell of a lot of escapism, he wasn't going to head to the bar. Besides, he had his own booze. It was simply a matter of getting into it. Easy as pie.
Or, it should have been, except the bottle toppled over as he was attempting to pry the cap off, and it took him with it. The next thing he knew, he was on the floor, face down in spilled scotch, and his body was a good four inches away from his head.
Oh, good. Not only was he an action figure, but he was an action figure with a freaking faulty balljoint for a neck.
This would have been less problematic if his body wasn't more interested in saving the booze than it was in solving the fact that it was slightly decapitated at the moment.
"No, stupid, I'm over here."
It was going to continue being A Day.
[Open! And I swear, he'll be normal again tomorrow. I just had to. My own Reno action figure's head falls off on a regular basis. Pretty, yes. Lots of points of articulation? For sure. But clearly not made to do much looking around, poor thing.]
He wasn't in a bad enough way that he was going to go to the bar. There were certain things that action figures shouldn't do in public. Sure, he could go to The Perk to give computer lessons and he could scar his friends for life, but the bar? Even if he was hurting for a drink and a smoke and a hell of a lot of escapism, he wasn't going to head to the bar. Besides, he had his own booze. It was simply a matter of getting into it. Easy as pie.
Or, it should have been, except the bottle toppled over as he was attempting to pry the cap off, and it took him with it. The next thing he knew, he was on the floor, face down in spilled scotch, and his body was a good four inches away from his head.
Oh, good. Not only was he an action figure, but he was an action figure with a freaking faulty balljoint for a neck.
This would have been less problematic if his body wasn't more interested in saving the booze than it was in solving the fact that it was slightly decapitated at the moment.
"No, stupid, I'm over here."
It was going to continue being A Day.
[Open! And I swear, he'll be normal again tomorrow. I just had to. My own Reno action figure's head falls off on a regular basis. Pretty, yes. Lots of points of articulation? For sure. But clearly not made to do much looking around, poor thing.]
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More giggling. "I would totally buy one. I'd keep it on my nightstand and give it kisses at night."
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"You're gonna scar the newbies for life, yoto." A beat. "I'll get some Maiden's Kiss to go with that, so the newbies ain't stuck as frogs for too long, yoto."
He would not be adverse to kisses at night, therefore he did not argue when she called him an adorable action figure dammit.
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She frowned at Reno again. "I'm being awful to you, huh?"
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It had been an embarrassing day as it was, dammit.
"Tell Rude he might as well forward the photo on to Tseng, zoto. Can be my excuse for not gettin' my report done this week, or whatever."
See. Totally wasn't good blackmail if he wanted it to be passed around.
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Rikku leaned over and kissed the top of Reno's spiky head. "You want a bra ride?"
Sometimes, she had weird ideas.
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...
This was going to take a moment to sink in. But only a moment.
"So long as I ain't the only passenger in your bra, yo." He was grinning. Going for a ride with the wonder twins would be a very pleasant sort of way to make up for the fact that this had been possibly the most humiliating day... since he'd been dyed blue.
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Look, the Reno Action Figure was welcome to take a ride, but if the Sold Separately Sidekick Pack was waiting to come along, they were Not Allowed. That was just wrong.
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And then pointed. One hand at Breast Number One. And the other at Breast Number Two.
"I'd like them to come for the ride too, yo."
Subtle, Reno? Pfft. It was important to be clear, here. Otherwise he'd just be an eight-inch action figure riding around in a b-cup like it was a bucket seat.
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"Isn't that the whole point?"
Really, she wasn't going to take a spare and make him a swing or something. She just thought he might enjoy getting up close and personal with -- whoa, okay, put like that it sounded kinda disturbing? Still. Rough day, no liquor and no smokes and he was an action figure and Fandom was so weird.
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"I wouldn't be adverse to the prospect of goin' on a bra ride, zoto."
Because they were talking about Reno going on a ride. With a pair of giant boobs.
He had the best girlfriend ever.
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"Say please?"
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Seriously. Best. Ever.
He was not bouncing at all in anticipation of the boob ride. Nope. Not much, anyhow.
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She blinked down at him. "This island is seriously warping my mind."
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He had hated the island until... about ten seconds ago. Now he was too busy appreciating the landscape to take any issue with it at all.