raspberryturk | Edge, Friday Afternoon

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Edge, Friday Afternoon

Distress calls from Rookies, left, right, and center. That was what Reno came home to, after over a week without phone reception out in the wastes. And now it was the countdown, before one Rookie would get here, with Ifrit only knew what kind of trauma fresh in her head.

Pick up the phone. Dial numbers. He had well over an hour, between the time Ino's portal would arrive to pick her up, and the time it would actually make it into Edge, after all.

"The boss sends me on one mission in the middle of nowhere, Mako, an' the whole universe goes to Hell without me, zoto."

[NFB for distance, as usual. Open for anyone who needs a Reno call or who wants to give one, all calls will sit chronologically before a certain Ninja visitor, yo.]

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"You want dirt?" Elena laughed. "I've been sending booze and porn. I didn't think to make it a trifecta with dirt. What kind of plants? Anything edible?"

She stretched out on her bed, watching the ceiling. "I stopped by the reserves-group," she said. "I don't know. I think I've had enough of the military to last me a lifetime. I don't want to go back to drills and salutes."

"If Arthur is makin' people salute out there now, lemmie know so I can portal to Fandom to bitch-smack him, yo."

Salutes. Honestly, now. Reno didn't do any of that march-in-time shit, and he hoped to hell that the reserves hadn't started.

"Dirt's good. Edible plants, good. Somethin' that don't need much sun, if you can swing it. Ino's been sendin' radishes an' peas. I'm so friggin' sick of potatoes, if you send any of them, I'll mail 'em back with explosives taped to 'em."

"That'll be my secret plan to get explosives from you," Elena laughed. "Okay. Edible, no-sunlight plants. I'll see what I can scrounge up. Along with more titty mags and grain alcohol."

The necessities in life.

"I might be ... coming back now and then," she said, trying not to bounce too obviously over that. "For missions, on weekends when I'm not too busy. If you guys need the help."

Still a Turk. It was pretty fucking sweet.

"We need it," Reno replied. There was no pause for consideration there, no. He'd just spent a week and a half out in the freaking wastes. Doing a job that Tseng had sent him on.

And now he was in trouble for it. For fucksakes.

Mostly because Tseng was trying very hard not to admit he'd been worried about her, and Tseng enjoyed taking his issues out on other people. Mostly Reno.

"Then I'm in," she said. "Tseng ... offered."

Tseng was being nice to her. It was weird as hell.

"If it wasn't going to interrupt my studies and all. I said I'd manage. You know how much I'm studying, over here."

"Oh, yeah. Studyin' nice an' hard," Reno laughed. "What's the lesson of the week look like? Brunette? Blond?"

Important studying indeed!

"I had someone feed me strawberries a few days ago," Elena teased. "You know. Studying hard as always. How are the toothless whores around Edge?"

"Just as hard-up for crack as they always were," Reno laughed. "Too cheap for my tastes, though. I'm a fan of the more toothy blondes from Spira, lately."

Monogamy! Woo!

It was adorable. And seriously weird, thinking of Reno like that.

"Has Rude scored that bartender yet?" Elena laughed. "I'd hate to think he's resorting to the crack whores."

"I think he's givin' extra big tips to Titties Lockheart in hopes that she'll notice him," Reno laughed. "It ain't workin'. She's damn hung up over chocobo-hair, yo."

Which was sad, really, because chocobo-hair was an idiot.

"We should tie him up, leave him as a present for her," Elena suggested. "Or else buy him some sort of season pass for the hookers. Maybe a go-round at an upscale one for his birthday."

"Ooooh, one with all her teeth an' her shots an' everything?"

BIG SPENDERS.

"We'll get Tseng to cough up some phone numbers."

Buuuuuuuuuurn.

"I vote you make the call askin' him for the numbers to his whores," Reno laughed. "I wanna see the look on his face when you do, yo."

"Do you know how ego-crushing it is," Elena sighed, "to be turned down in favor of whores?"

No, I do not want your free sexual favors. I would much rather pay those women for theirs.

"You'd have to bribe me something good for that."

"I got peas, radishes, an' beans," Reno laughed. "Or I can promise to keep Mako from pissin' in your bed while you're away. Any of that interest you?"

"If Mako pisses in my bed, I will tell the landlord that you're stealing from him while he's asleep," Elena giggled.

"An' if the landlord tries to evict me, you lose your pad," Reno replied.

Check: Mate.

"He likes me," she insisted. "I could probably crash with him for a while. Without putting out or anything."

"He's probably gay," Reno decided. Because if you could have someone like Elena sharing a room with you and not want her to put out? You had to either be gay, or Tseng-like somehow.

Honestly.

"Orrrrrrrrr maybe he's just a nice guy," she laughed. "They exist. Now and then. Oh, wow, there are some adorable little ones around here. I want to adopt them and mess their hair up and try to get them laid. Which is gonna require some alcohol, let me tell you."

"Good luck gettin' the booze into some of 'em," Reno laughed. "You met Merlin, yet? I got him hammered on dick-in-the-dirts one night at Caritas, zoto. Caught hell from Arthur for it after that."

Something in his voice suggested that it had been totally worth it.

"No, I haven't," she laughed. "Got into a little tiff with Arthur, but that's another story. Everything was different, on the other island."

She chewed her lower lip for a moment, hesitating before she could bring herself to admit the rest.

"I had to talk to Zack," she said.

... Damn that name, anyhow. Reno freaked a little inside every time he heard it.

"Did you, now?"

"He was a vampire," she said nervously. "Cruel and twisted, and still angry that no one came to rescue him. I shot him point-blank and told him that no one came for him because SOLDIERs are disposable anyway."

It had been a good psychological tactic. It had saved her life, or the other-her's life. She would do it again. It still made her flinch.

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