raspberryturk | Edge, Saturday Afternoon

There were some things that were totally worth getting in trouble with the boss for, Reno decided. Being a grumpy son of a bitch was good for things like getting on Tseng's nerves, teaching the rookie how to run for cover, and also for getting sent on impromptu vacations to other worlds in order to visit the girlfriend.

It had totally been worth it. But, as such things tend to go, this vacation didn't last forever, and soon Reno was hopping another portal back to Edge.

The first thing he did upon getting home was reach for the Everclear that Romeo had sent him. Romeo was still the best buddy ever, and Reno was going to have to find some way to make it up to him. Maybe he'd ship him some porn or something. That was always excellent payback, right?

And then he checked the texts and voicemails that he'd missed lately. Which led to a lot of alternating between laughing and frowning. Killing beans and killing babies were two very different things indeed. But hey, verbal Twitters were amusing, at least.

It wasn't until he went to check on the beans to be certain that they were still alive (they were) and the ferret to make sure that he wasn't dead (he wasn't) that a chunk of plaster fell from the ceiling, hitting Reno solidly on the head and reminding him quite firmly that he wasn't in Spira anymore.

Sigh.

"Home sweet shithole."

[NFB for distance and all, but Reno's open for phone calls, text messages, random letters, and all of that good stuff.]

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Alice didn't use her phone enough. She was going to dial the Card Guard's number and see what he was doing.

Ooooooh. There was a ringtone that he didn't hear often!

"Alice!" He was mostly over the fact that the ceiling had fallen on his head now, yay! "How's my favorite queen doin' today?"

Queen-who-was-a-rookie! Rookie-queen! Rookqueen!

... He was putting the Everclear down, now.

Queen, rook, pawn, Alice could take most of the spots on the chessboard without blinking. He could be a knight; card guards were well-suited.

"Quite well, I suppose," she said lightly. "We had another fire drill. It was raining, so no one was concerned about fire."

Except herself, but that went without saying.

"Daaaaamn. In the rain this time? The school administration is freakin' cruel, yo. Least they could do is put a shed or somethin' outside of the dorms for the students to huddle in when they're kicked outta bed at three in the mornin', yo."

"I doubt we're evicted frequently enough for it to occur to them," Alice mused. "I was quite grouchy, though I suppose holding fire practices is preferable to the alternative."

"Yeah. A hell of a lot better than the alternative," Reno agreed, his tone mellowing out some. He could see how that would be pretty rough on the girl, dammit. "Maybe next time, take shelter in the stables or somethin'. You might come out smellin' like horse, but at least you'll be dry, zoto."

"I wanted to watch," Alice admitted softly. "Just in case."

How ridiculous that sounded.

"Anyway, Good Alice was selling umbrellas, and I've a very good idea for a much more interesting fire drill. One that resembles an obstacle course. Fires are hardly orderly or well-lit, after all."

"This is true," Reno noted. "What kinda obstacle course did you have in mind? I'm thinkin' you gotta lay out them tires for people to jump through. That's always important."

"Something dark," Alice decided. "Fire drills are clearly announced, and bright. Reality is darker, smoky, and clogged. The stairs might not be usable. The building's going to be in disarray. It needs to be confusing, not clear. Nothing's clear, then."

Reno pursed his lips and stared up at the ceiling.

"Things ain't usually clear at the best of times anyhow, are they?" Hm. "There are only a handful of ways outta the building, yo. Just the one staircase. If there even was an elevator, you wouldn't catch me dead on it. I'd sooner jump."

He jumped a lot.

"I mentioned that," Alice nodded. "That jumping out a window is preferable to waiting inside. One can survive a jump, after all."

She hesitated slightly. "I didn't intend for this conversation to be quite so unpleasant."

"Hey. Unpleasant conversation don't mean it's shitty conversation," Reno pointed out. "It's still good to hear from you, yo. Nice to hear some familiar voices now an' then."

Edge was full of a great deal of very unhappy, unfamiliar ones. It wasn't home. Not the way Fandom was.

"It's good to hear your voice, as well," Alice said, frowning slightly as she realized that was true. She didn't like to get attached. It only led to pain. "Have you been doing much guarding, of late? Keeping the royals safe from harm?"

"Gardening is more like it," Reno mused, glancing over at his beans again. "Learned today that beans come in yellow. Why didn't nobody ever tell me that beans come in yellow?"

He smirked a little.

"And I guess a little guardin' on the side, too. Mostly monster killing. Keepin' the people safe. All that noble crap."

Edge, Saturday Afternoon

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