Room 429, Monday Evening

[raspberryturk]

To Reno, today had been about as uneventful as a Monday without classes could possibly be.

Except for the sheep.

He never would have suspected that another day devoted to lazily surfing the internet for t-shirts with dirty slogans could possibly turn into an attack by a flock of tiny ruminants, swarming in around his ankles and attempting to graze on his socks.

With this unexpected invasion underway, Reno did the only thing he could think of.

He put a bowl on the floor, he filled it with the last of his rum, and he watched.

Who needed the internet when there was a room filled with tiny drunken sheep to watch?

He was silently hoping for a baaaaaar brawl to break out.

[The door is open, the post is open, I cannot promise sanity, as I have slept two hours in the past 48. Again. Hooray sheep!]

Comments

[the_merriest]

She gave him a small smile back.

"I was fifteen the first time someone who wasn't an Al Bhed called me a friend," she said. "I don't think it's funny. I'm ... glad you had them. You know?"

It was maybe the first time since all of this started that she was happy about it, too. But everyone needed family.

[raspberryturk]

"Weird thing about family, I guess. Never know when you're gonna end up with it or where it's gonna come from."

And there, he resisted giving her hand another squeeze.

"Sign up for a job, you think it's gonna just be a job. A way out, whatever. Kinda surprisin' how tight-knit it all is."

The same, oddly enough, could be said about high school.

[the_merriest]

"You know," she said, chewing on her lip as they reached the bottom of the stairs, "I was gonna ask you once. If ... if you would leave, if you could, and I was gonna hope you said 'oh, you bet, I'd be out of there like a shot.' Because ... because of what they've asked you to do. And what it does to you."

She took an uncertain breath. "I ... don't think I got it. How much it all means to you. I mean, I know you ... square your shoulders when you say Turk, but it's not just that. Right? There's ... good parts, and bad parts, but ... nothing's easy. Family never is. Pops is crazy and he and Brother aren't speaking, again, and Brother never thinks I can take care of myself and I was gonna strangle Yunie if she didn't stop moping on Besaid already. And I'd die for any of them, in a heartbeat. I couldn't ... just ... walk away from that. It's like losing a limb." She looked over. "Is that weird?"

[raspberryturk]

He shook his head.

"No, not weird, yo. I, uh. When ShinRa fell? When Meteor came and crushed the shit outta Midgar and we figured the boss was pretty much freakin' done for, and it was just me and Tseng and Rude and Elena and everything had gone all to hell? For all the chaos that was goin' on around us, for as much as it sucked seein' Midgar in pieces an' all that... The biggest worry I had was..."

He shrugged. Felt stupid. Death and geostigma and Meteor and the collapse of an empire and guilt and more death. Just sounded... stupid.

"No more Turks. Scared the livin' shit outta me, even after all of that, zoto."

[the_merriest]

"But I thought ..." Rikku stopped for a second, watching him, and then shook her head. Wasn't important, she could ask later.

She tugged lightly on his hand until he turned around, and slid her arms around him.

"I ... get it. I think. Your family. And ... your identity. What it means to be you, yeah?"

[raspberryturk]

... He could live with this. If talking about things ended up with him getting hugged, yeah, he could live with it.

"I wasn't anything until I was a Turk," he mumbled, and then returned the hug. "Nothin' before it's worth thinkin' on. So... just throw it all away and... whatever. Yeah. It's my identity, yo. And my family and the rest of it. And sometimes I hate it, but that don't mean I can just turn and leave it behind, either."

[the_merriest]

"That's not true, you know," she said, not letting go just yet. "You weren't nothing. Your life sucked and you didn't have much but you, you were still you."

[raspberryturk]

"I was still..." He glanced at her from the corner of his eye. "Me. I guess I was. Different name, different life, but... yeah. Still me."

He sighed and leaned his forehead against hers for a moment, then caught himself and straightened up a little. But just a little.

"Whatever that was, I'm me now anyhow, zoto."

[the_merriest]

"You changed your name?" Rikku raised an eyebrow. "Was it something really embarrassing and hard to pronounce? Edgar? Ivan? Phil McCracken?"

Shhhh, she was allowed to be a dork.

[raspberryturk]

"Nah, wasn't a bad name," Reno replied with a bit of a shrug and a bit of a smirk. "It was just That Kid, is all. And I ain't that kid anymore. Still me, sure. Just not him. All the Turks take new names, yo. You figure Rude's parents were really that mean?"

He grinned a little at that.

[the_merriest]

She laughed. "It made more sense than him picking it himself. I mean, he seems pretty polite, you know?"

Back to walking again, which meant reaching over to take his hand again. "Don't you miss it? I mean. It's kind of weird for me sometimes just that ..." She blushed. "It's kinda stupid. No laughing?"

[raspberryturk]

Rude, polite? Clearly, Rikku had never been thumped upside the head by him before.

"No laughing," he promised, smiling over at her. Smiling was easy when her hand was in his like this. Crazy.

[the_merriest]

"It sounds different, in this language," she admitted, scuffing her toes a little on the ground. "Rikku. It's softer, mellower, the vowels are less sharp and you don't hit the Ks the same way. It's faster in Al Bhed, more staccato and ... it's kind of weird, sometimes, that's all."

She lifted a shoulder. "What was your name? Before."

[raspberryturk]

He stopped walking again, at that. Looked at her with a faint frown puling at his lips as he let the question sink in and chew at his mind and ... it was difficult, really, making sense of the question as though his old name was something that he might just give out casually upon request.

He hadn't thought that name in years. It wasn't him.

He shrugged a shoulder, took a breath. Tried to put his head around it. Couldn't.

"The kid who had that name died a long time ago," he said at last. "Sayin' his name now would be like bringin' back a ghost. My name is Reno."

[the_merriest]

"I know that," she said. "You're you. You're Reno. But that doesn't mean he's dead. He's still ... with you. That's not a bad thing."

She gave him a long look. "But ... I didn't mean to ask if it's ... not something I should have. I'm sorry."

[raspberryturk]

"Nah, don't be sorry for that." Reno raised his free hand and waved it dismissively. "It's somethin' I walked away from. Someplace I don't ever wanna be again, and... the name's just all a part of that. That kid ain't me. He can stay that way, zoto."

[the_merriest]

"Okay," she said, nodding. "I get it. He's gone. Just ... you know. If he wasn't? I'd kinda want to meet him. That's all."

She had a feeling she was saying it wrong. Maybe he'd understand anyway.