Kalm, Planet Gaia, Tuesday Night

[raspberryturk]

And the travels of the two potion-wielding weirdos continued, with Reno and Rikku catching a portal after Reno's radio broadcast to a town called Kalm, complete with cheery little colonial houses that gave no indication of the horrible state of decay that Midgar was sitting in, somewhere not far to the Southwest.

"Nothin' like complete government collapse and mass death and disease to boost the economy for the little folk," Reno mused as he made his way along the street, looking up at the cozy rows of housing around them. "Wanna crash at the inn here tonight, or would you rather start the hike to the chocobo farm place, yoto? It'll be a bit of a hike, ain't nobody here gonna led us their chocobos, and we got no way to snag a car or somethin' from this neck of the woods, yo."


"Where are we?" Rikku asked, peering around at the comfortable houses lined up in rows.

It was crazy, but she had sort of thought maybe all of Gaia was as bleak as Edge. Weird.

"We can get started tonight. I don't know how far the walk is? We can always sleep out in the open, though, can't we?"

Wasn't like they hadn't been camping out for the past week, anyway.


"This place is Kalm. Pretty much any place that had a reactor at one point or another is strugglin' through hell right now, yo. Kalm got lucky. It got a shitload of the Midgar refugees, and none of the Meteorfall downtime. I can do without stayin' the night here, yo. Campin's fine by me, zoto."

Not all of Gaia looked like Midgar. Just most of Gaia. Like Junon, for example. Poor freaking Junon.

"It's a bitch of a hike. Probably best we start the walk now, yo. I only ever saw the place by air doin' chopper fly-bys, anyhow. Rude's a friggin' hero for settin' up the deal for us in the first place, zoto."


"Rude gets cookies," Rikku decided, taking his arm and following along. It'd be neat to see the open countryside. Maybe there was a lot more of Gaia that was still okay than the bits that weren't. "Is he gonna meet us there? I'll give him big squeezy hugs if he is. Does he think you're insane for getting them?"

Hey, Rude, I want to buy some chocobos. Blue! Help me out?


"Rude always thinks I'm freakin' insane," Reno pointed out with a grin as he led her toward the edge of town. "I can't see him stickin' around a chocobo ranch for too long, but you never know with that guy. He's got a soft spot for little cute things that's bigger'n the bald spot on his head."

That was to say, Reno didn't know.

[NFB for distance! For the_merriest, who helped write this and who rules like a ruling thing!]

Comments

[raspberryturk]

"Names are dangerous," Reno said without hesitation. "If I'm Reno, I'm Reno. That's that. If I'm that other guy, the one who lived that other life somewhere else, then that means that whole other life is in danger, zoto. I mean, it ain't a big deal for me, or someone like Cissnei, we didn't have nothin' to look back on after we joined the Turks. But, like, Tseng, or Rude...? Just 'cause they can't go back to where they came from doesn't mean they don't look now and then. If Rude was still so-and-so from somewhere-or-other, and people found that out? In this line of work?"

Reno kind of left that one hanging.

"Used to be, Turks didn't take other names." Like Vincent Valentine. Freaking stupid, alliterative name, but it was real. "Turks didn't do the same kinda shit then that we did, though. They didn't make enemies quite the same way we did, yoto."

[the_merriest]

"They could go after his family," Rikku said softly, eyes widening. "Would they? I mean, that's ..."

She paused. "You don't get to see your family any more. Do you? If you're a Turk. It's too dangerous, otherwise. They wouldn't need your name if they could follow you home, right?"

[raspberryturk]

"If you're a Turk, your family's the Turks," Reno replied, shrugging a little. "Most of us didn't need nothin' beyond that, anyhow. It was... Kinda a recent development, that too. Somethin' went bad, for one of the higher-ups. Lost most of his family. Tried to leave the Turks when he found his daughter again. AVALANCHE had her. Not that fuzzy little cub-scout squad you met with Tifa and Chocobo-Hair. The nasty ones I actually have a reason to hate."

He pursed his lips a little. And then grit his teeth and gave his head a bit of an angry shake. Not angry at her. Just... Angry. At all of it. For a moment.

"If they knew she was Verdot's kid, it would'a been even worse, I think. For all of us, zoto."

And that was keeping in mind that most of the Turks from that era now existed only in some ShinRa database under the rubble somewhere, with the word "Deceased" sitting next to their names.

[the_merriest]

"I never said you didn't," she said carefully. "Have a reason to hate them, I mean. Just because ... you know. Sometimes, neither side is right, yeah? There are people over here and other ones over there and ... okay, I kinda don't like your old job all that much, but that doesn't mean anyone against them is right, either."

She may not be making sense. But if he could translate Rude's grunts, there was hope, at least.

"I'm glad they didn't know," she said. "No one deserves that. To have their kid be ... just some pawn. That's horrible."

[raspberryturk]

Okay. Okay. Reno was going to take a deep breath. And hold it for a moment. Shut his eyes. Nod. Breathe again.

Okay.

"There are better ways to get a point across than by killin' people, blowin' up cities, playin' with mind control on whole armies of people, and then tryin' to destroy all life on a planet with a giant freakin' summon. ShinRa wasn't much better. But it's tough to take a bunch of people seriously when they try an' tell you you're fuckin' up the world by... You know. Killin' shit."

Reno shrugged. "Wouldn't have done anybody any good if they ever found out where any of us were from, zoto. They'd take off after some place in Wutai, next, to get to Tseng, or maybe they would'a tried to fuck with Rude. Or me, though there ain't much dirt on me from the slums that could break me. That's all the names are. Security."

[the_merriest]

"It is," she agreed gently. "If you're killing people, you're not the good guys. Rule of thumb. The rest is just excuses. You don't get to say you're at least better than those other people. Because you're not the good guys any more. Maybe they thought they were, once, and they lost sight of what it meant. That's a scary thought, isn't it?"

She hesitated before adding, "That's ... what worried me. When I ... with your boss, and all."

Pulling a gun on someone, just because you really thought they should be dead now. Really not a good sign.

[raspberryturk]

"You wouldn't have done it," Reno said, stopping in his tracks and turnning to face her, to loop his arms around her and pull her close.

Maybe because he really needed it right about now, too.

"And that ain't anything bad about you, either, Rikku. Rufus probably is the kinda guy that's better off in a body bag. But... Like you said. If you're killin' people..."

Reno really wasn't the good guys. Reno was pretty much okay with that.

[the_merriest]

"I didn't mean --" Rikku stopped short, hoping he couldn't see her blushing in the night air. "That sounded wrong. I'm sorry? That, uh ..."

Snuggling in was perfect, right about now. He had good instincts for that sort of thing. She was going to hold on.

"Just because ... someone's better off that way, doesn't give me the right to put them there," she said carefully. "I mean, then I'm no better. Right?"

[raspberryturk]

"You didn't do it," Reno pointed out. "So you're a hell of a lot better, yoto."

He gave her a little squeeze, turning his eyes upward.

Yeah, the sky here did kind of suck.

"Don't worry about it, anyhow. Some people are good guys. Some people ain't. Some people just do what they figure's gotta get done, no matter what side it puts 'em on. Between you and me, if there really is such a thing between 'good guy' and 'bad guy,' I wouldn't know it, yo."

[the_merriest]

"Maybe you're just a Turk," she said, trying for a reassuring smile. "Good guys, bad guys, the heck with all that mess. You do your job, and you do it damn well, and then you go grab a beer."

Rikku had the strangest feeling that she might, finally, be Getting It.

[raspberryturk]

"And then we go grab a beer," Reno agreed, a shadow of a smirk creeping over his lips again. "Don't make me nothin' but whatever I happen to be at the time, yo."

He looked back down at her, lifting an eyebrow.

"You do the job. Not because you're a good guy or a bad guy. You don't wanna rule the world, and you ain't really out to save it, either. You just do it 'cause it's gotta get done, zoto."

[the_merriest]

She nodded. "I'm not saying ... you know. That I think it's awesome and ... all of that."

She got it. She didn't necessarily approve, especially since it felt like he could switch his ethics off and line up with whatever side was passing out his orders, and okay, yes, that bothered her.

But she got it, maybe, and that was progress. Wasn't it?

"Did you ever ... I dunno." She shook her head. "I mean, it's not your job to worry about people, just ... if you could have said no more, would you have? Did you ever ..."

[raspberryturk]

"Put my foot down?" Reno was frowning thoughtfully at that question, pulling back a little and looking at the plains stretched out around them. They had quite the hike ahead of them, didn't they? "Say no?"

...It’s going to look weird if all the townspeople disappear at once. Can’t keep doing stuff like this, you know.

He grit his teeth a little. Gave his head a shake.

"I didn't. And if I did, it would'a been to cover my own ass, back then. Things change, zoto."

[the_merriest]

"I mean, you couldn't say no. Then." She shrugged, lightly, as she chewed her lower lip. "Which ... I get. I'm just wondering if ... you know. If you ever wanted to, even though you couldn't."

If he'd ever ... regretted it, wished he could do something else, wanted to stay his hand. Something. Anything.

[raspberryturk]

"There wasn't no room for second thoughts," Reno said, pressing onward as though he was going to settle for leaving it just at that.

Two or three steps along, he stopped, turned on his heel, and looked her square in the eye.

"Yeah, Rikku. Even I had second thoughts. Wanted to speak up, sometimes. For all my morals are worth anyhow, yo."

[the_merriest]

"They are worth something," she said loyally. "I was just ... you know. Worrying that ... I'm not sure what I was worrying. I'm sorry that you couldn't stop any of it. I think I'm just ... sorry that you were in that position, maybe."

[raspberryturk]

"I chose that position. It was my meal ticket." Reno shrugged. Started walking again. "Like I said, though. Shit changes. I'm not in that position no more. I get to say no if I wanna."

[the_merriest]

"Lots of things have changed," she agreed, carefully. "You've changed. But I think ... I mean, you don't think you're a good guy, but ... I think you lean a bit more that way than the other. Don't you?"

[raspberryturk]

He was stopping again. Turning around to face her again, and mulling that over. Carefully.

"Just 'cause I wanna fix what I helped mess up don't mean nothin'. What happened back in Edge doesn't tip the scales or anything. Just means I get to say I did somethin' right for a change." A pause. "I know the difference between right and wrong. I just... don't think a few right things make for right people, is all."

In the face of the things he'd done in the past, he didn't get to be a good guy.

[the_merriest]

"That's not what I mean," she said with a gentle smile. "I mean ... you have good intentions. More of the time than not, yeah? You did bad things, but not because you really like death and suffering and evil. Just because it was your job. But you've done good things just because you think they should be done, not for a job at all. Haven't you? Doesn't that count for something?"

[raspberryturk]

Reno was chewing at the inside of his cheek, now, closing his eyes and working his way through all of it. Motives and actions and morals, the whole lot of it never did seem to measure up in his head. If you turned in an innocent man to live a life of hell as a test subject for a madman, what difference did it make if you were doing it because you were getting paid for it, or if you were doing it because you wanted to?

"I don't know," he said at length, falling a little more deeply into his usual slouch. "Maybe it does. Just to me and nobody else in the world, though. They wouldn't know any different anyhow."

[the_merriest]

"And me," she said, reaching for his hand again. "It makes a lot of difference to me, zoto."

It was the difference between him being a bad person and a person who did bad things. And when you loved someone, that was an important distinction.

[raspberryturk]

He stood there for a moment in the darkness, no sky worth looking at, finding her eyes instead and trying to lose himself in them, there in the night.

Such small, clean hands...

"That's all the difference that really matters, then, ain't it?"

He gave her hand a squeeze and attempted a small smile. It was something. And acknowleding that it was... That was everything he hadn't been able to do, before.

[the_merriest]

It was something. It was huge. It meant she had to wrap her arms around him and stand here, for a long time, listening to the night air and holding him close.

Then there was traveling further down the road, and setting up camp for the night, and she tried to insist there should be ghost stories of some variety, because what sort of campfire was there without ghost stories?

In the morning, they were on the road again.

"Okay, so ..." She glanced around. "Where is the farm, anyway? I mean, you know where we're going, right?"

Gaia had lots of GPS stuff. Problem was, most of it seemed to be offline.

[raspberryturk]

Reno's, for example, was not only offline, but making cranky sounds at him.

His PHS hadn't been charged in a week, now, after all.

"Should be just up ahead, like, a little way. Kinda around the bend, yo."

He squinted and looked ahead of them, frowning. Okay. They had to be- "Ah!"

It was an ugly-ass barn thing, with a huge yellow chocobo painted on the front of it. Really, it was a mystery how they could have missed it at all.

"Race you, zoto!" And he was running before the sentence was out of his mouth. It was entirely possible that he was just as excited to meet his baby bird as she was.

But he'd never admit it.