Room 429/Healin Lodge, Slightly Later Thursday Night

[raspberryturk]

Tseng sighed. It was good to know Reno hadn't lost his flair for the dramatic.

He lifted his phone.

Okay. The fucking laptop was dead. Reno knew it was dead. It was dead and was never coming back.

But it was the last thing in his room that Rikku had touched before all shit hit the fan. So, he was going to take that duct tape that Doji had left behind, and he was going to damn well fix the laptop. Kind of. And nothing in the world could interrupt him.

Except the ringing of his phone. Probably Tseng. Just sent his report and all.

"Yo, boss."

Tseng cracked his knuckles. "Clever."

Reno wasn't smirking at all, really. Maybe a bit.

"You figure? Could'a used more marquis, I think."

Tseng's voice was as dry as ever. "Am I to assume the bottom part is inviting me to go and fuck myself?"

Tseng was now copy and pasting the Al Bhed portion into a blank document.

Reno actually had to take a moment to get his head around the fact that Tseng had even used that word.

"Was just a little demonstration of some of the education I been pickin' up on here on Fandom Island, yo."

"I see," Tseng said. He saved the blank document as translation1, and opened a new e-mail. To: one of his connections, a linguist in Kalm. Subject: Assistance Requested.

He continued talking while typing. "You are aware that insubordination carries a penalty of docked pay."

"Good thing I got my report done early, then," came Reno's more-smooth-than-was-necessary reply. Because punctuality couldn't be classified as insubordination, really.

The body of the e-mail was coming right along.

Broca,

Attached please find a document of a highly sensitive and confidential nature. It is presumably written in the language spoken by the Al Bhed tribe, from a planet known as Spira. The words 'Rikku' and 'Turk' are proper nouns.

"You don't believe that inviting me to go and fuck myself would count as insubordination?" Tseng asked.

"Guess you'd have to know for sure if that's what I was actually sayin' in order for it to be somethin' you can dock from my pay, huh, boss?" Reno didn't sound smug at all. Much. "Ryja vih."

The typing continued.

Your usual pay rate would be honored, but this is a personal assignment from me, and not one that you should report to The President. The text is presumed to be insulting in nature, if that provides any assistance.

"Oddly enough, the president has granted me a wide latitude in my abilities," Tseng said. "I don't have to prove insubordination in order to dock your pay."

Reno's smug tone was taking on a bit of a dangerous edge again. It had been a long week. He wasn't in the mood for this shit, even if he had egged it on.

"You gonna punish me for slappin' a bunch of letters together in a language that don't even exist on our planet? That's real special, Tseng."

Completed.

I am also offering a bonus of 50% of the total fee if you can return this within 24 hours.

Tseng

And sent.

"Would you rather come home?" Tseng asked. Wondering idly whether, at this point, Reno would say yes.

Reno fell silent for a moment.

Wasn't a good thing that he had to actually stop to think about it.

...

"No. I'm here to do a job. Still plannin' on doin' it, zoto." He had all the time in the world to devote to it now, after all.

"Very well," Tseng said. "You've been docked three days' pay."

It was generous, under the circumstances, and that reminded him, he should enter that into the accounting database.

"It was not my intention that you reveal yourself to your friend." 'Girlfriend' seemed rude, if she had, in fact, left him.

Reno had to close his eyes and take a deep breath before he found himself docked a few more days of pay.

Finally, he opened his mouth to speak again. "She asked."

Tseng nodded. "Had you anticipated that she would react strongly?"

Reno frowned, deeply. He didn't want to talk about this. Not like he had a hell of a lot of choice. Maybe he could get through this conversation without puking. "For months, now."

Tseng hesitated. So hard, crossing that boss-employee barrier. He couldn't ask what he wanted. "Strongly enough to jeopardize your mission?" he asked.

"I'm still a Turk," Reno replied, stiffly. "The mission is doing just fine, zoto."

Tread carefully. Carefully. "If she reacted strongly, and has perhaps voiced concerns to others, your situation may become difficult."

"I'll deal with it." There was a moment of silence, and then the long, high-pitched sound of duct-tape being pulled off a roll. Reno had a busted laptop to fix. The keys had to stick on somehow, damn it.

Duct tape? Strange. Tseng dismissed the curiosity. "Have you spoken with Rude?"

"Not since Sunday. Figure he probably caught enough shit from you already." The last thing Reno wanted was to get Rude in more crap for keeping more secrets. If there was anything else he was going to keep a secret from Tseng... Rude was going to have to not know about it, too.

Which sucked. But Reno wasn't going to keep putting his most trusted friend into that sort of position. Wasn't fair to the big guy at all.

"I would have expected you to call him," Tseng said, frowning. "All things considered."

Such as your heavy drinking and the presumed loss of your girlfriend.

"Less Rude knows about what's goin' on in my life, the better for him, zoto." Another long pull of tape. Another almost-audible scowl. "Guy's probably got enough crap goin' on with work anyhow."

"I would imagine he can make time," Tseng said. "You are partners."

"Partners don't let partners end up with docked pay for keepin' secrets," Reno intoned. See, he totally knew that philosophical crap.

Tseng leaned back in his chair. "Are you blaming him for your deductions, or are you inquiring as to whether he has incurred a similar punishment?"

"How much hell did you give him on Monday? I'm willin' to bet my left nut that you gave him some kind'a shit for not tellin' you about-" duct tape. Lots of duct tape. "-things."

"We had a conversation," Tseng said. "About priorities and loyalty, and errors in judgment."

"About me." Reno set the busted laptop down. Some things just couldn't be fixed with duct tape, after all.

"About you," Tseng agreed.

"Flattered how much you love this heart-to-heart crap lately, boss," Reno muttered into the phone, giving the laptop a frustrated shove to the side. "Bet Rude was thrilled, yo."

"Reno. When Rude was concealing information of this magnitude, you made it your duty to become personally involved. Did you not?"

No one had actually told Tseng about Chelsea. This did not mean he didn't know.

"That was different," Reno snapped into the phone, suddenly very tempted to just hang up. It wasn't different. Not really. He knew that.

"Of course," Tseng said. It wasn't.

"So, did you have anything important you wanted to say, or did you just call to tell me you were dockin' my pay and to bitch about shit that ain't an issue?" Reno was anxious to end the call. He still wasn't up for it. Everything was still upside-down and inside-out, and just because Romeo had said that Rikku was concerned for Reno's well-being... It wasn't easier.

"Four days," Tseng said tonelessly. "And do not turn in a report of that nature again."

There was a click as the line went dead.

Reno sighed and snapped his phone shut.

Four days of docked pay after buying a laptop to replace the one that Rude had said to smash up meant that he was budgeting like hell this week to be able to afford to eat instant noodles.

And that he was going to be very, very thirsty until the next payday.

[[the_merriest is still the Tseng of awesome, post is open for interaction after the phone call, if anyone is up this ridiculously late at night, and we're totally being a pair of nerds.]]

Comments

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny took a pull off the gin bottle before she said, "I enjoyed my fruit basket. So. What's eating you? Or do I need to get you considerably drunker before I ask that question?"

[raspberryturk]

"Right now, this very moment? ... I'm gonna need another mouthful, first." He reached for the bottle and took just that. "It's a lot of crap, I guess. That's the problem with the bad shit, yo. Always brings friends along."

He shrugged and offered the gin back.

"Trouble with work. Trouble with... other things. It's complicated. Where should I start?"

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny took another drink and handed the bottle back. "Well, at the beginning is generally a good place."

[raspberryturk]

"The beginning involves talkin' a lot of crap about where I'm from and what I do for a livin'," Reno said, and another mouthful was in order, here, totally. "Guess I could give you the abbreviated version by tellin' you that I work for the government back home. I do the dirty work."

He'd been giving the detailed account enough this week that he was experimenting with coming up with new and exciting ways to say all of this.

[ashockingbitch]

"I know a bit about doing the dirty work," Jenny said, "but I'm pleased to report I've never worked for the government." Stormwatch totally didn't count in her head. "Know those that have, though. Go on."

[raspberryturk]

"The dirty work has a way of gettin' real dirty. Things you bury yourself in the bottle over. Stuff you don't admit to even yourself until you're pushed, and even then, somethin' else has gotta shove it down your throat to make it stick," he continued. "Stuff you can't never take back."

But she had just said she knew about dirty work. So he didn't have to explain that, did he?

"This week was a bit of that, and a bit of-" And he needed another mouthful, there. And to maybe pull out a cigarette and have himself a smoke, too. "Some people don't deal with murder as well as others. Not murder for The Man. Some people had real good reason to be upset when they found out I didn't tell 'em about it up front, is all."

[ashockingbitch]

There were so many ways to go with that. She could ask him to define murder. She could ask who he'd murdered. She could remember he was an actual teenager and wonder who the hell had him killing. Instead she said, "Bugger some people."

[raspberryturk]

"She has her reasons, I can respect that," Reno said, shaking his head. "Wasn't just that I killed someone. Was bigger than that."

He lifted a shoulder. Another mouthful was entirely in order, here.

"Isn't exactly like I got some kinda clean little desk job, or whatever."

[ashockingbitch]

Her. Now they were getting somewhere. It was always a woman, wasn't it? Who was Reno's girl? Rikku, wasn't it? "I didn't think you were the type to get messed up over a girl, mate."

[raspberryturk]

"Between the girl and the rest of it, it's been one of those weeks," Reno admitted. "I could go on to tell you about how the boss docked my pay and all that, but I think that'd just be whining, yo."

[ashockingbitch]

"What'd he dock your pay for?" Jenny asked. "Being emo? That's a good word, you know, emo," she rambled. "We didn't have it my first time 'round, but it's so obvious when you think about it." Whee booze.

[raspberryturk]

"I think he docked it because I told him to go get fucked," Reno mused, then smirked faintly. "Tseng's such a freakin' asshole."

Somehow, being drunk and calling his boss names made things a little better.

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny took another drink of gin. "I would have laughed. Of course. I was never a terribly good boss. I ruled by fear," she said fondly.

[raspberryturk]

"Last person I heard talkin' about wantin' to rule by fear ended up in a wheelchair after his company headquarters fell down around him, with an incurable disease slowly killin' him just to round things out real nice."

It was actually fortunate that Rufus didn't have the opportunity to establish himself as head of ShinRa as firmly as his old man had.

"Tseng's just got a stick shoved up his ass."

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny laughed. "Not like that. We all had the same goal. Just. They knew I'd dig 'em up and put them to work again if they dared to die on me. It was fair. Did you tell your boss that, too?"

[raspberryturk]

"About the stick? I'm pretty sure he already knows. 'S up there pretty far." Reno grinned and shook his head. "He's got reasons too, yo. Lost too many Turks real shortly after he got bumped up to head of the department. Figure he thinks he's teachin' me a lesson about ... I dunno. Puttin' too much formatting into my e-mails."

[ashockingbitch]

"..." Formatting? Really?

"Drink more booze," Jenny finally said.

[raspberryturk]

Hot pink bold marquis script was awesome.

"Booze is good," Reno agreed.

[ashockingbitch]

"It really, really is," Jenny agreed.