Room 429, Late Afternoon

[raspberryturk]

"Permission to crawl under the bed and die, sir?" Phone calls. Phone calls were the worst idea that every freaking universe out there could possibly have come up with. Phone calls were going to be the death of Reno, one of these days. This phone call felt like it had the potential. Freaking phone calls.

Tseng smiled, faintly. "I take it you're back to yourself, then. Good. We need to speak, Reno."

What Reno wanted to say was "Fuck you you fucking fucker fuck fuck fuck."

What Reno did say was, "Yes, sir."

Tseng's smile disappeared, somewhat quickly. "Reno. I admit I took certain liberties with your condition. I imagine you're upset with me, and I can't say unfairly. However." The rest went unsaid. For now.

Deep breath. Right. Okay. Reno wasn't going to be able to fit through the receiver if he decided that he had to leap through to strangle his boss. Then again, this was Fandom... "However."

There was always a 'however,' wasn't there?

Tseng frowned. "However. I felt it was ... necessary, considering the lack of detail, in your recent reports." And certain omissions. That didn't need to be said, did it?

Reno closed his eyes. Right. That lurch in his gut there was totally normal. It was all good. He'd wash it down with something hard, after the phone call ended. "I can... Uh..." What? Explain? No, no, he probably couldn't.

Tseng waited a few seconds. He finally sighed. "Reno. I'm going to ask you for a full report. I understand you have a need for privacy. But I think the situation's changed. Has it not?"

Reno licked his lips. Shit, his mouth was dry. Maybe the boss wouldn't notice if he reached for that mouthful of Everclear he had left. Maybe. "... Yes, sir."

Tseng's voice softened, somewhat. "I trust you. Implicitly. You understand that."

"Yes, sir." Reno felt kind of like a busted record, here. Everything kept skipping. "She..." She was... "I'm not just tryin' to stay for her. This is still about the assignment, sir."

Tseng was still filing. "I believe you," he said. She. Reno went there first. Still taking notes, yes. "Can you start at the beginning? Your arrival. Friendships, allegiances. Anything you've omitted as being too ... fantastic to be believed."

Reno frowned. Oh. Oh shit. This was. Was going to take a while. And that meant that he wasn't getting a drink and he was going to be holding his breath for a long time. "Almost the whole damn place is too fantastic to be believed," he muttered. "I think only maybe about half the population of the island is even human. Place keeps throwing random crap at you when you don't expect it, gets to the point where you just shrug and go, 'oh, yeah. It's Fandom, yo." Talk about the place. The place was good. It wasn't... Wasn't telling Tseng about... The rest of it. That part that he almost touched on a moment before. Couldn't go there right now.

"I see." Tseng nodded. They could ease into this, sure. "By-product of the dimensional nexus, perhaps. Were you mentally affected this weekend, or were you really reverted to a child state in some manner?"

"I was freakin' five, sir." There was a good deal of frowning, here. The frowning was beyond epic. It was more of a scowl. "Kinda... me, but me at five, too. Was... weird."

Understatement of the day.

"And yet still yourself," Tseng mused. "You knew your identification number and the rest. I imagine Rude required some convincing, as well."

Rude. They were totally getting around to Rude, sooner or later.

Reno licked at his lips again. "Not much, sir."

Reno had a very unique level of annoying that Rude was able to pick up on. Rude was a pro at that sort of thing.

Tseng nodded. "Very well. You had a stalker-roommate - more oddities from the nexus, or the conventional variety? And a weekend where you said you weren't yourself at all. How did that differ from this?"

"Tamaki was just nuts, sir," Reno replied. ... Well, he was. "The weekend where I wasn't myself... I just wasn't. Was someone else, from somewhere else, never for a second thought some guy named Reno existed. This weekend, I was just me. But five."

"Were you someone else?" Tseng asked, carefully. "An imagined character, or someone that other people knew and might recognize? I suppose you may have no way of knowing."

Reno swallowed. "I was someone real," he said. "Three kids from here knew the guy." He left that one hanging. Didn't want to go too far into detail about lighting the roof on fire.

"And while you were him, you had no memory of your own experiences and life, correct?" Tseng asked. Dimensional nexus. This was fascinating.

"None. Looked like him, thought like him, could do whatever he could do. Just... was him, zoto." This was stupid.

There were two points left, and Tseng was fully expecting Reno to be reluctant to discuss either. Tseng chewed his lip in silence for a few moments.

"The angels," he said, finally.

Reno grit his teeth. Right. The angels. Right. So. There were these statues.

"There were these statues. And... You got the report. I dunno. Couldn't just... leave it be." He couldn't. Tseng had to know that, right?

"Couldn't?" Tseng asked. Lightly. Carefully.

Maybe Tseng would hear Reno flinch, there. Reno hoped he wouldn't.

"Was them or me," he said. Which was... really a huge fucking lie. Tseng had to know that. Reno sighed and tried again. "Was them or... Look, they just. Freakin' took off with people. Whole place was a clusterfuck and there's no way you can stay outta that kinda shit."

"You expressly disobeyed a direct order," Tseng said. Calmly.

"Yes," Reno replied. "I did." And what was Tseng going to do about it? There was that edge in Reno's voice that asked just that. He did something that had to be done. 'Sit this round out and hide like a fuckin' pussy while your girlfriend's crying' wasn't an option. .... Oh.

"I'm familiar with how you work," Tseng said. Still calm. "You've gone against directives in the past. It usually ends up saving another Turk's life."

Reno relaxed slightly at that. Slightly.

"Weren't no other Turks involved," he stated.

"I know," Tseng said. "That was somewhat my point."

Reno hated it when Tseng made 'somewhat' points.

"Jus' get to the point, already," he said, trying his best not to hiss that phrase out and add a few colorful bits of the English language to it.

"There aren't any Turks on that island," Tseng said sharply. "There are damn few of you left. Your loyalties and allegiances lie here, first. Disobeying direct orders to keep underlings alive is one thing. Risking yourself for your neighbors is another."

"Rikku ain't just a fucking neighbor, Tseng, or Rom-" Reno winced again. Great. Drop more names to the boss. Freaking brilliant. Damn it damn it damn it. "Got a few people here worth disobeyin' orders for." Asshole.

Damn it.

"I see," Tseng said. Frowning. Audibly.

He waited. Usually if he waited, Reno would continue.

"Yeah, I bet you do." Reno was frowning back. Not nearly as audibly. Perhaps the middle finger that he was aiming somewhere toward the causeway would be more audible. "Trust me except when you don't, yo, Tseng? Had to get involved. And stayed out of it until there was no," well, not as much, "risk that it'd go sour."

And his girlfriend had put up her hand, too.

Reno had to recognize that loud exhale by now. That was Tseng keeping his temper, forcibly.

"I trust you, as far as I can. I trust you with the lives of our associates. When you begin putting yourself in danger for the sake of something not relevant to the mission, that upsets me."

"Not a hell of a lot of a mission if the whole island gets sent back to 1899," Reno shot back. "If I'm not gonna get up the balls to walk backward and blink, who the hell is? Gonna leave it until it's me keepin' my eyes open with tape while four statues all try to eat me at once, Tseng?"

"Then you call Rude, he picks you up, and you come home," Tseng said sharply. "No mission is worth us losing yet another Turk."

"Funny how I'm still here," Reno snarled into the phone. He was angry because Tseng was right. And wrong. And. And. "I'm still here and everyone who was taken is back. Pretty fucked up world I'm in, when the people who go missing actually come back."

"Did you know they would come back?" Tseng asked coolly. "Did you know there was no risk, to yourself?"

"Wakin' up every morning's got risk to it, zoto." Reno's own voice had gone equally cool. To that place with the dark edge. The one he probably shouldn't reserve for his boss. "You can't honestly think otherwise. We wake up every mornin', don't matter what we got planned for the day. I was fuckin' careful, Boss. Trust my partner with my life." And then, because he had to say it. Couldn't leave well enough alone. "Wasn't gonna end up like Cissnei and the others."

There was a long, cold silence.

"There is a difference," Tseng said, finally, "between the average risks we take, on missions, and you pig-headedly involving yourself in a rescue mission which I expressly forbade you from joining. There is a difference between dying on a mission and dying because you are too short-sighted to remember where your loyalties lie. There is a difference between Cissnei," and the name sounded harsher for the flinch that went with it, "and how we would have lost you. Had your partner not been as reliable as you're presuming."

"I trust her just as much as I trust any Turk," Reno hissed. "This ain't about questioning my loyalties. This is about doin' somethin' that had to be done. Got my fill of sortin' out my loyalties a year an' some change ago, Boss."

Another silence. A cold one, while Tseng kept himself from saying anything more than would be prudent.

"So this is about her," he said, finally.

Very suddenly, the anger that Reno had been swallowing back surged forward, feeling more like bile and nausea and puke. It felt like fucking puke.

"I'm still a Turk," he said, and the bottle that he'd been tempted to open was thrown across the room, because that was a better idea than throwing the phone. "I'm still a Turk and I'm still standin', and you wanna question my loyalty because of this, Tseng, then you go right the fuck ahead."

"Should I?" Tseng asked harshly. "A few people worth disobeying orders. Wasn't that what you said a minute ago? You're still a Turk. And now there are people who you'd rank higher than your own mission. Ones you never bothered to tell me about."

"You wanna tell me what to do some more, Tseng? I'll do it. I've followed orders from you. Followed orders from Verdot before you. Followed fucking orders from here to hell and back. You want to tell me to get my ass out there and press-gang some more dumb fucks into SOLDIER, an' I'll do it. You got someone you need dirt on? I'll get it. You want someone dead, Tseng? You got someone that's gotta die today? You wanna give me some more goddamn orders? I can do it! I do do it! You can tell me to go out there and drop another motherfucking plate--" Reno's voice cracked. He flinched. He took a breath. Shut his eyes and oh fuck. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck he didn't want to take this here. He went quiet. Barely heard the words as he said them, himself. "... I'll do it. I'll drop another fucking plate for the Turks. But you can't ask me to let those people stay dead."

The plate. Tseng was pinching the bridge of his nose again. He didn't want to talk about the plate. Didn't want to remember that time. AVALANCHE back and the President gone mad, three Turks left, go kidnap that Ancient (Aerith, Aerith, she had a name, damn it) and while you're at it, bring the plate on down. That would show them.

Tseng had said yes, sir. As you wish, sir. Because that was what the Turks did.

Tseng hated this job some days. They all did.

Tseng exhaled. Slowly. "I see," he said.

"I'll fucking do it," Reno said again, and he believed it. Knew it. Was what he was. Wasn't anything else, was there? "I'll do it. You give me the orders. I do 'em. 'S... how this works, zoto."

The fight in Reno's voice was gone. Reno wanted to gather up the pieces of the bottle and maybe suck the Everclear from the carpet and curl up somewhere and he was better than that. Fucking better than that. He was a Turk. He was a Turk.

"But I ain't gonna let anything happen to the people here, either."

"I'll need dossiers," Tseng said. Calmly. "The important figures, on this island. Both public concern and any you might find to be relevant."

Translation: I want to know who runs the island. And I want to know about your friends.

Reno nodded. Slowly. Tseng probably couldn't hear his nod. Reno was barely aware that he was doing it. He had a voice, somewhere in there. Would just... take him a moment to find it, is all. Just take a moment. "Yes, sir."

Translation: I'm a Turk. We complete the mission no matter what. Because we're Turks.

Tseng nodded. Dammit. He didn't like this mission. Was liking it less as time went on. But he had orders, too.

"Very well, then," he nodded. "Your next report is due Friday."

"Yes, sir." Reno nodded again. "Friday, you'll have a report, sir."

Unless I become a kid before the weekend, or turn into someone else, or get eaten by stone angels.

Tseng nodded. "Dismissed." And hung up his phone, and frowned at it for a very long time.

Cissnei. Aerith. Meteor falling. Sector seven, lying crushed under its plate. And all the Turks who never came home.

Finally he lifted it again. "Rude. Report to my office immediately."

Reno stared at the phone. Shut it. Stared at it some more.

Dropped it on the floor.

Walked over to his wastepaper basket.

And threw up.

He was fine.


[Preplayed with the astounding the_merriest, who continues to be an awesome Tseng. Similarly, the post is open only to the non-Tseng version of the same, if you please.]

Comments

[the_merriest]

It was a chipper sort of knock. Mostly. Less chipper than perhaps its usual. Still somewhat chipper. It was --

Rikku knocked, and it was a very Rikku sort of knock.

[raspberryturk]

It... it was a Rikku knock. There wasn't a knock in quite the same flavor of chipper as a Rikku knock. It was. Well.

It was a Monday-after-a-fucked-weekend-knock.

And here was Reno, crouched over a bin, retching. Swallow it. Swallow it. Wipe his mouth on his sleeve. Swallow it. ... "Yeah," he finally said. Maybe she'd even hear it.

[the_merriest]

She did, faintly, and frowned at the door. And then swung it open and ... oh.

She was kneeling next to him in an instant. "You're sick," she said, eyes wide with concern.

[raspberryturk]

Reno wished for all the world that he was five years old again, and this would be just something else to hug about, and maybe another topic would jump up again and they could laugh and this conversation would be avoided entirely.

But there was that taste in his mouth, filling up his brain, and he was swallowing it all down.

"No," he said, wiping his mouth on his jacket again to be sure, before he peeled the jacket off and tossed it over the bin. "Not sick, zoto."

Just... Sick.

[the_merriest]

"Yeah, I puke in wastebaskets all the time," she said, her arm sliding around his waist and pulling up. "C'mon. You need to lie down."

[raspberryturk]

He shook his head, shifting a shoulder forward as though perhaps he was thinking of pulling away entirely. But standing was better than kneeling over a dirty basket, and the bed seemed inviting, now that she'd mentioned it, and he was still reeling from the phone call.

A lot.

"It's not... Nothin'. It's nothin', really."

A very big nothing that nearly had his ass pulled back to Edge, really.

[the_merriest]

Even better than standing was sitting on the bed. For him, at least. She was going to crouch next to him and put the back of her hand against his forehead.

"Did you wake up like this?" she asked. "Did you eat anything weird yesterday, because you were insane and five and someone dared you? You could have food poisoning."

[raspberryturk]

If there was anything about his forehead that might indicate that he was anything but okay, it might have been the crease of his brow. His temperature was fine. Not much of a cold sweat or anything.

"Marshmallow and salami pizza," he muttered with a shrug of his shoulders. "That ain't it."

[the_merriest]

"Lie down," she said, frowning. No temperature, that was good. "You need fluids and sleep. Juice? Soup? Maybe you're just worn out from the weekend. That's when things like this sneak up on you. Your immune system's all shot from too much partying."

[raspberryturk]

"I don't have to lie down," he stressed again, kicking his foot forward to send his phone skittering a little farther across the floor. Stupid phone.

Yeah, because this was the phone's fault. Of course.

"Really, Rikku, I'm not sick. S' somethin' else, zoto."

[the_merriest]

"Oh." She stopped short, biting her lip and straightening up. "Whoa. Okay. Um. What's ... going on?"

[raspberryturk]

"It's..."

Loyalty. Right. Being a Turk. Right.

"It's not anything you have to worry about," he tried, though he was pretty sure the moment he'd said it that the answer wasn't going to be nearly enough. "Phone call, is all."

[the_merriest]

Phone call. Rikku took a deep breath and braced herself.

"How bad?"

Must be pretty bad. Stupid question, right there.

[raspberryturk]

"Boss had a conversation with me. Yesterday." He grit his teeth for a moment, sighed, shook his head. "Didn't like my report so much. Called back today."

Stupid, stupid phone calls.

[the_merriest]

Rikku closed her eyes. Okay. Boss. Yes. Unhappy boss. Not good.

"I'm so sorry," she said quickly. "About the laptop. Um. Rude said ... I thought Rude said to trash it. But I was ... really little and massively insane? So. Probably ... not so much? I'll get you a new one. Honest. Is he mad?"

Not about that. About the rest of it. Any of it. Still.

[raspberryturk]

"Wasn't about the laptop," Reno sighed, giving a shake of his head. "Rude probably did tell you to trash it."

Oh, shit. And now he was realizing that he'd unintentionally ratted out on Rude covering for him while he was five. Shit. Shit.

"Tseng's just... Concerned. Tseng's always concerned. I ever mention the stick that's shoved up his ass so far it's nudging his brain?"

Wow, that whole thing just came out bland. Maybe Reno would try to skip the joking entirely, right now. Because everything seemed so... dry.

The smell of spilled Everclear was filling his head.

[the_merriest]

"No," she said, chewing her lip. "You ... don't talk much about him."

Or work, really, or the rest of the Turks. Just Rude, and vague references to things that he never wanted to elaborate on. Maybe couldn't.

[raspberryturk]

Oh...

"Tseng's the boss," he muttered. "Boss Turk, anyhow. Has been for a bit."

Not very long at all, really.

"Worried I'm gonna get myself killed, here."

Nice of him. Or something.

[the_merriest]

"Is he nice?" she asked. "Um. Aside from the ... stick-thing. I mean. Is he a ... good boss to have?"

She was chewing harder. "Does he ... want you to go home, again?"

[raspberryturk]

"I'm stayin," Reno answered, giving a shrug of his shoulders. "Gotta get some paperwork outta the way, is all."

Dossiers. Words did not express how much Reno didn't want to go near those with a ten-foot pole.

"Tseng ain't a bad Boss." There was definite emphasis on the word 'boss.' "Just doesn't want to lose any more Turks."

For good reason. Granted. Didn't make Reno any less pale, right now, as he stared at the phone on the floor.

[the_merriest]

"You said that, before," she said, sitting down carefully on the bed opposite his. "Something ... happened, to some of the Turks, yeah? It makes sense. I mean. That he'd be ... protective."

A warm, nurturing boss, who sent Reno out to hurt people. Right. Made total sense, right there.

[raspberryturk]

"Dangerous job," he muttered. "You get your head around it all. I mean. When you wake up to it every day, zoto. People don't come home. It's part of the job."

He shut his eyes and took a deep breath, bound and determined to swallow it down. "One thing when it's on the job, I guess. Can run bloody mayhem all around Midgar, so long as it's on orders."

Could. Before the rest of Midgar joined Sector Sev--

"He'll cool down. Ain't an issue."

[the_merriest]

"He's ... mad?" Rikku asked, hesitantly. "Because he thinks you're ... doing dangerous stuff here? Not the dangerous stuff you're, uh. Supposed to be doing."

She was a little unclear on what that was, exactly, but that was okay. Right?

[raspberryturk]

"I got involved in the mess with the angels," Reno replied. "Puttin' myself at... unnecessary risk."

He sighed and shook his head, running his hands (oh shit, they were shaking) through his hair before placing them behind himself on his bed.

Again. He was fine.

"He gave me orders not to get involved, zoto."

[the_merriest]

"Oh." She pulled one of her knees up onto the bed with her, hugging it against her chest. "I didn't ... know. Is that why ... you weren't checking your texts? Because you were ... breaking the rules and they were gonna get mad?"