Middle of Nowhere, Gaia, Saturday Night Fandom Time

[raspberryturk]

Reno stared at the little sphere in his hand, squinting hard at it. It had almost killed him to get this damn thing, this stupid fucking piece of doomsday that AVALANCHE - the real AVALANCHE - had been so hell-bent on getting their mitts on. And he hadn't told Tseng yet. Hadn't really told anybody but the Rookie.

He had a little piece of the end of the world, the beginning of the end of the Turks, right there in his hand. Shit, he was still bleeding on the damn thing. Or maybe that blood belonged to the Ravens he'd taken down to get it.

AVALANCHE would notice it was missing before long. They'd send someone to investigate and they'd find blood and footprints and the telltale smoke and ozone smell of thundaga in the air. And he'd be long gone by the time that happened. He looked down at the corpse of the Raven on the ground. He spat on it as the body began to fade.

And then he picked up his phone and placed two calls. One to Portalocity, telling them to send a portal to a location that was a good ten minutes away on foot, if he ran like hell. And, as he was running like hell, he placed a second call.

Now the mission was out of his hands and over to Iris.

[OOC: For one!]

Comments

[raspberryturk]

"Figured I'd get your input before putting more gunk in there than I gotta," Reno replied with a shrug. "Top bit's gonna need a little negotiating anyway, I'm sure."

This was what happened when you had crazy people hair.

[intraspective]

"That's because whoever cuts your hair usually needs to be taken out back and shot," Ino said sternly. Between his terrible posture and her heels, she was actually tall enough to get a good view of the back of his head today.

There was something to be said for heels. And for not having to stand on a stool.

"Okay, hang on, I know what I'm doing," she said, as she reached for a comb, a few pins, and a hair elastic. She'd need hairspray, but she'd use that in a bit. "Stay still."

[raspberryturk]

Huh. Pins. Reno could count on one hand the encounters he'd had with hairpins, and none of them had involved his own hair.

"Staying still," he replied, anyway. "Lemme know if you need me to pass you something. My hair is in you hands, yo."

He was trusting you, Ino.

[intraspective]

With his hair, she was absolutely trustworthy.

Besides, this was a nice interlude before he murdered her later.

Ino was kinda looking forward to his reaction, honestly. She was The Worst.

"I'm good with hair," she said, instead, as she started working. "And you'll clean up just fine."

[raspberryturk]

"I'll have you know," Reno drawled, "that I already know I clean up good. I just don't choose to do it often."

It had been a good frigging decade and some years now since he'd been anywhere he might have to.

[intraspective]

"Hush," she said absently, most of her attention on this hair. "Don't argue with a beautiful woman when she's complimenting you."

Honestly, Reno.

[raspberryturk]

"I think I was halfway agreeing," Reno pointed out, "but whatever you say, yo."

He could behave himself on occasion. He was too tired to stir up too much shit, anyway.

[intraspective]

She was sleep-deprived too.

It made for an interesting combination.

Ino just hummed, and kept on working. It went fast, all things considered, especially once she wrestled all the hair on the top of his head into position. That was where the pins came in, tucked under the top layer, where they'd hold but not be seen, and then hairspray applied to hold everything in place just in case.

The braid down his back was easy as pie in comparison. She tied it off with a clear elastic and surveyed her work.

"Much better than cutting your hair," she said, satisfied.

[raspberryturk]

Reno tilted his head, looking at himself in the mirror, somewhat bemused.

"Shit," he laughed, "where'd I go?"

He hadn't seen himself in a disguise like this in forever. It was almost unsettling.

"How long we got before we gotta take off, anyway?"

[intraspective]

"You look like you're fit for a date with me," she said cheerfully. He looked damn hot with his hair like that.

"Ten minutes," Ino said, stepping back from him. "Enough time to not rush back to the Causeway."

[raspberryturk]

"Well, good," Reno said, straightening out his tie, and then straightening up his posture, rolling one shoulder and then the other, his usual drawl slipping into something a little more refined.

A little more, 'clearly Reno is immitating Tseng's speech patterns,' mostly. But he was damn good at it.

"Ten minutes? Plenty of time to take a pretty lady on a nice stroll to catch a portal, I'd say. We have quite the evening ahead of us, I trust."

[intraspective]

"Oh, geeze," Ino said, looking up at him. "First--you're even taller, which, unfair. And secondly, I'm gonna have to start talkin' like that too."

Dammit.

Like Reno, she could do it. But ugh.

[raspberryturk]

Reno blinked, and then Reno laughed.

"I have faith that you can do it," he replied. Yes, he was going to stay in this persona until they had safely disposed of the materia. Better for making sure it didn't slip. "Just talk like Rosalind to go with all of this Tseng I'm doing now. Nobody will ever guess."

[intraspective]

"The only problem with that is that Rosalind defers to Tseng," Ino said, a bit dryly, a she headed out of the bathroom. "I don't particularly defer to you."

But yes, fine. She was going to talk like a normal person now too.

[raspberryturk]

"Hey, I said talk like her, not act like her," Reno protested with a grin as he followed along. "Rosalind defers to Tseng, but you and I? We're on a hot date. I don't think she'd be caught dead on one with him unless there were orders involved."

[intraspective]

"I think the idea of dating the boss would make her pass out." It was probably true. Sorry, Rosa.

"She has a crush on Rude, anyway," Ino added as they headed out of the apartment.

[raspberryturk]

"No way, really?"

Reno, you had literally lived through this like fifteen years ago. You knew this.

But then, Reno needed gossip in order to live. Even if it was fifteen year old gossip. So sue him.

[intraspective]

"Definitely!"

All Turks needed gossip to live. It was a law.

"But Rude's so hung up on that bar girl in the slums, and Rosa's pretty shy about that sort of thing, so..."

[raspberryturk]

Reno leaned his head back and groaned.

"What is it with him and bar girls, anyway? Look, we have to hook him up with Rosalind and get it out of both of their systems for their own good."

Because otherwise, Rosalind was going to die miserable and Rude was going to just spend the rest of his life pining over ladies who weren't all that interested in him anyway.

[intraspective]

It was the tits, Reno. Even Ino knew that.

The streets of Fandom were cool, but not cold. It was a night that felt like Spring and Ino enjoyed that as they walked through the quiet streets.

"Do you think he could be nudged that way?" she asked. "Seriously, I mean."

[raspberryturk]

"Seriously...?" Reno pursed his lips for a moment. "I mean... my Rude, right now, in hindsight, could probably be convinced, if Rosa were still alive. Then Rude? Little Rude?"

He shrugged his shoulders.

"It would probably take some weird gymnastics to get him to notice her as more than just the rookie."

Hell, she hadn't been the rookie in years. But rookies were rookies forever, even when they weren't Rookies.

[intraspective]

"That's what I thought."

Which. Ugh. Did not bode well for trying to get them together.

"And I don't dare say anything to Rude. Rosa would kill me."

[raspberryturk]

"And if I were to say something to him, he'd probably just start acting weird around me." A beat. "Weirder around me."

What exactly did you say when a future version of yourself and a future version of your partner appeared and started doing weird undercover stuff claiming to be saving the world, anyway?

[intraspective]

"Maybe I could get Elena to blab at him," Ino mused. "She's not a Turk but she does work at a bar now. It would be easy enough to get the Turks to head there after a mission and she's never been good at keeping her mouth shut."

Sorry, Elena. But it was true.

[raspberryturk]

Reno gave a little snort at that.

"Tell me about it," he muttered, with all the experience of a Turk who had worked with her as a Turk. A Turk who had needed to suck it up and work with baby AVALANCHE in order to save her ass when she was stuck hanging upside-down from Da-Chao.

Oh, Elena. And Elena's mouth.

"But hey, if you can put that bug in Elena's ear, she might go running off the mouth at Rude the next time he's in there looking for drinks. That's not actually a bad plan."